• Carmen Milligan

Fits Me to a "T"! And maybe a bit of a rant, as a bonus.

Updated: Mar 31, 2021

In a peer conference call at work today, I commented, "I don't have time for that bullshit," when they were discussing the sometimes extensive review and follow-up that others' work requires. I'm a busy girl, so I just told them. My friend Fran said something about taming my language, and my other friend Andrea said, "That tongue can't be tamed." I LOVED that, and think I need it on a t-shirt. When I mentioned the t-shirt idea, Andrea said, "I approve this message!" How funny is that?!

So, at 55 years old, I think it's safe to say that my tongue can't be tamed.

When I did a search on taming the tongue, you know, to get a cute pic, I found a LOT of Bible references. From my church days, I do remember that the entire chapter 3 of the Book of James is about taming the tongue. And it says clearly that it can't be done.

James 3:8 "but no human being can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison."

So, there. I'm pretty much off the hook.

But then I also saw this picture. Evidently, if you go to Teen Life Christian Youth's website, you will see what evangelical Christian leaders think of when they hear the word "gossip".

Excuse me? 1940 called. They want their stereotype back.

It seems to be a common theme. On the Illuminated Living site, there is an article called "Ask God to Tame your Tongue", and here is the pic:

Again, clearly a woman's mouth.

What? Do men not gossip? Are all of the articles on infidelity illustrated by a dick?

See? This is why I can't go to church. At least not any of the churches around here, seemingly stuck in 1973 Sylacauga, Alabama during a tent revival with a preacher wearing white patent leather shoes and enough hair grease to lube a 1973 Buick Centurion.

See what I did there? I tied in a whole 'nother Bible reference! But, to be clear, the 1973 Buick Centurion was a behemoth of a vehicle, and perfect for cruising to lunch after a hellfire and brimstone sermon.

It's antiquated ideas like this that make people think it's okay to tell a woman that saying "fuck" is not very ladylike. Neither is peeing standing up, but you do what you have to do when using a 7-Eleven toilet.

There are a lot of things not "ladylike". Ask Margaret Sanger, Marie Curie, Elizabeth Cady Stanton, and Ruth Bader Ginsburg. Margaret Sanger championed birth control. Marie Curie had to fight for the honor of being the first woman awarded the Nobel prize, since the committee wanted to award it to her husband for the both of them. Elizabeth Cady Stanton partnered with Susan B. Anthony in gaining the right to vote for women. And Ruth Bader Ginsburg championed rights for both men and women through legal channels.

We've come a long way, baby. And that means that, if I want to say "I don't have time for that bullshit", I'll say it. Because that's what I mean, and I say what I mean. This article in HuffPost by Bianca Pang says it like she means it. Or, try out this gem by Casey K. Daniels. Google "ladylike" and you'll get the gist of just how much ladies do not give one shit about being "ladylike".

If that offends you, then fuck all the way off.

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