• Carmen Milligan

If you give a mom a margarita...

Do y'all remember those "If you give a mouse a cookie" books? They were hella adorable, and there is an entire series of "If you give a" children's books now. But where are the adults in this? I mean, don't we deserve a cookie? Here are the titles I would choose to teach adults cause-and-effect:


"If you give a mom a margarita"

"If you give a dad a drill"

"If you give a grandpa a Grand Am"

"If you give a grandma a granola bar"


It would go something like this:


If you give a mom a margarita, she's going to ask for salt.

When you salt the glass rim, she's probably going to wish it was on the rocks.

When you remake the drink, she's probably going to change her mind about the salt.

When you wipe the salt off the glass, she's going to make a face like she sucked a lemon.

When she makes a face, you're going to tell her that her face may freeze that way.

When you say the word "freeze", she may feel a little chilly.

When you get her a blanket, she is probably going to spill a little bit of her drink on her shirt.

As she is taking off her shirt, you are probably going to start to panic.

As you start to panic, your organic deodorant is going to fail and you are going to start sweating.

When you start sweating, you are going to start taking off your shirt.


See? You are riveted, aren't you? These circular stories are so fun to read, and a little challenging to write. How would you finish this one? It has to end with another margarita, of course! haha

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